Grace
My parents have been cruel to each other and to me in various ways. How to love them?
Naran
The irony is we know how to get angry or how to blame. Who taught this? How does it come to us so naturally?
While learning to live from childhood, we have been learning wrongly. Unfortunately, there is no teacher.
We observe, understand and form a thought, conclusion and start believing. We should understand that when by being in resentment, resentment only grows.
By being in a state of anger, anger only grows. In spite of our knowing that anger and resentment cannot achieve what we want, yet we will be in that state. You may not love them.
Can you not help yourself by getting away from resentment? See what you cannot see. Don’t see what you see. When you stop judging, you start observing.
When you observe, you understand what you have not so far understood. Any feeling that blocks our progress can be released. Get any feeling that can enhance your life progress.
Grace
Thank you for such a complete answer. I am grateful. I know intellectually that holding on to my judgment of them is causing me problems. I will try to do EFT or something to reduce my resentment (although I never call it that!). Some part of me thinks it would be wrong to allow them to just be who they are. As if the judgment will save me from becoming like them.
Naran
Don’t drag them into your life now. Unite all the parts. Forget what happened and treat them as new persons and be neutral first. Even the slightest resentment against them, will bring the same type of persons in your life.